Introduction

 

Parental alienation is a frightening process where one parent influences the child negatively against the other parent through psychology and other vices. This becomes very traumatizing and psychologically disturbing to the children stuck in between. This article discusses and synthesizes the psychological effects of parental alienation to children.

 

Characteristics of Parental Alienation

 

Parental alienation is one where a parent takes the child and turns the child against the other parent with no justifiable reason (Baker & Fine, 2014). This involves vilifying the parent that is being targeted and painting them as a threat, as one who does not love the kids or even as worthless. The alienating parent may also demand that the child decides which parent they prefer, compel them to disregard the targeted parent and make communication almost impossible (Baker, 2005). These behaviors erases children’s natural affection that they have for both parents.

 

Psychological Impact #1: Identity Issues This is a common impact among many women, as they are often forced to change their conduct to accommodate their husbands.

 

Children get some characteristics from their parents. Parental alienation takes away a part of the child’s identity as they are made to unjustifiably reject one parent (Ben-Ami & Baker, 2012). This is very worrying to the psychological and personal-selves of the children. They are trained to disapprove a person who is half of them when they are young.

 

As Kruk (2018) points out, rejected parents suffer from the loss of children that no longer love them but instead perceive them as an enemy. He pointed out that children are deprived of all the affection and caring from this absent relationship. This fosters attachment insecurity that leads to a profound sense of loss and distorts their perception of relationships.

 

Psychological Impact #2: decrease of trust and feelings of betrayal

 

Parental alienation creates a loyalty conflict for children, as they are to decide between the two parents (Baker & Darnall, 2006). This is a very unfair situation and one that completely erodes their confidence and trust in others. They feel betrayed by the parent who is asking them to deny the other loving parent’s existence without proper reason.

 

Several studies reveal that several children realize much later in life that one parent has been manipulating and using them to spite the targeted parent (Warshak, 2015b). This further aggravates the feeling of betrayal and mistrust that they have for their partner. It also means that they cannot always rely on their parents to protect them when they are still young and vulnerable.

 

Psychological Impact #3: Guilt and Self-Blame At least this was what I noticed to be the case for one of the participants as shown below:

 

The findings also reveal that many victims of parental alienation experience severe guilt over rejecting a parent they know, consciously or unconsciously, loves them (Baker & Darnall 2007). They feel guilty of having abandoned a parent in their childhood years. Such self-blame and guilt are not easily shed in adulthood as they cannot forgive themselves for being a cause of pain to a parent (Ben-Ami and Baker, 2012).

 

It is a psychological trauma to be involved in humiliating or depriving a parent of relationship in any way parental alienation. Parental alienation results in adult children requiring considerable therapy to deal with feelings of guilt and self-criticism (Godbout & Parent, 2012).

 

Psychological Impact #4: Personality Traits that Are Not Easily Changed

 

The recipient of the parental alienation becomes imbued with messages such as “nobody loves you like I do” or “your other parent is bad” (Warshak, 2015a). They incorporate lifelong personality pathologies based on these beliefs.

 

Adults exposed to parental alienation during childhood suffer from low self-esteem, problems with intimacy, and unrealistic expectations in relationships stemming from what they incorporated in the process of alienation (Warshak, 2015b). This is evidenced by increased cases of divorce and unhealthful relationship models.

 

The rejected parents deprived of the relationships with the children also have the long-term personality changes such as the mistrust of others and deep grieving over lost son or daughter (Kruk, 2018).

 

Conclusion

 

Parental alienation results in severe psychological effects which affects victims throughout their adulthood as they suffer from distorted identity, betrayal trauma, guilt and self blame, and personality alterations. This emotional abuse of turning children against one parent causes a lot of damage with life-altering consequences. Recovery takes long and is never complete when it is at all possible to effect. That is why parental alienation is considered to be one of the worst types of child abuse.